How to Stop Buying Too Many Toys: A Listener Question
If you’ve ever looked around your home and wondered, How do I stop buying too many toys and how did we get so many?, you’re not alone. Toys seem to multiply on their own, no matter how often you try to declutter. Whether it’s gifts from family, impulse buys, or those little add-ons from the store that seemed like a good idea at the time, the toy clutter can quickly become overwhelming.
In this post, we’re going to dive into a common issue many moms face: managing the constant influx of toys while trying to keep your home organized and functional. I recently received a great question from Courtney, a busy mom of two boys, who feels like she’s constantly decluttering toys, yet still drowning in them. If this sounds familiar, you’re in the right place!
Keep reading for practical tips and strategies on how to stop buying too many toys, set boundaries, and regain control of your space.
Courtney’s Question
“I have a hoarder past, but for the past few years, I’ve been on a decluttering binge. However, one thing I find difficult to keep up with is the ever-present, overflowing boxes and bins of toys. The Legos, the small ones that get stuck in your feet, and Perler Beads seem to multiply. I’ve tried telling family and friends that my boys don’t need more toys for birthdays or holidays, but no one listens. I donate a box of toys and clothes to the thrift store every week, but it feels like it’s never enough. What would you suggest for decluttering and organizing all the toys?”
Hey Courtney! This is a perfect question, and I’m excited to dive in. I also got some background info on you, which helps me better understand your situation. You’re married, have two boys (ages 5 and 7), and live in Colorado. You work full-time in a hybrid role, spending three days at home and commuting two days. You’ve got two big herding dogs, and you mentioned that both you and your boys have ADHD. So, there’s a lot happening, and I’m guessing your days are pretty full!
Let’s break this down.
1. The “Box a Week” Approach Might Not Be Enough To Stop Buying Too Many Toys
You mentioned you’re donating a box a week to the thrift store, which is awesome, but my guess is that it’s probably not making as big a dent as you need. Here’s why: even though it feels like you’re constantly decluttering, it’s possible you have more toys than you realize, and a single box a week might not be enough to really see progress.
Let me share a story with you. A few years ago, I helped a mom named Savannah declutter her home. She had three kids and, like you, she felt like she was decluttering constantly but not making any progress. So, I spent a day with her. We ended up bagging up 22 huge bags of toys in one day—and her playroom was STILL full! We didn’t even touch the garage or other parts of her home, just the toys in her kids’ rooms and play areas.
This showed me how much clutter can really pile up, and sometimes we just don’t realize the volume until we do a huge purge. I think you might benefit from a big overhaul like Savannah did, to get ahead of the game. Sometimes, taking small steps like a box a week isn’t enough, especially when there’s so much coming in from family and friends.
2. Why We Get Overwhelmed: ADHD and Clutter
You also mentioned that both you and your boys have ADHD. With ADHD, it’s not about not being able to pay attention—it’s about paying attention to EVERYTHING, which makes clutter even more overwhelming. The small toys, like Legos and Perler Beads, can make your space feel chaotic because it’s so hard to keep track of everything.
The solution? A massive declutter to get rid of the things that are overstimulating and overwhelming for you and your kids. I’m not just talking about a few toys—I’m talking about really narrowing it down to what you all actually use and love.
3. Setting Physical Boundaries To Stop Buying Too Many Toys
Once you’ve done the big declutter, the next step is to set physical boundaries for how many toys you keep. In our home, we have dedicated spaces for toys, and once that space is full, nothing else comes in unless something goes out. For example, we have one bin for Legos and one little box for small toys like Shopkins or Mixie Qs. That’s it. If something doesn’t fit, it doesn’t stay.
This is also helpful for kids with ADHD because it gives them a clear, visual boundary. They can see when things are getting too full, and it’s easier to keep things organized.
4. Handling the Incoming Flow of Toys
It sounds like family and friends aren’t always listening when you say your boys don’t need more toys. You’re not alone in this! Here’s what I recommend: start sharing your decluttering journey publicly (whatever that means to you—whether it’s on social media, through conversations with family, or even just texting them updates). When people see you actively decluttering, they’re more likely to understand that you’re serious about it.
If you don’t want to deal with toys coming in, suggest alternatives. Ask for experiences instead of toys—things like zoo passes, museum memberships, or even contributions to a savings fund for a family trip. That way, they’re still giving, but it’s something that won’t add to the clutter.
5. Taking Ownership of What Comes Into Your Home
Here’s a tough one: are you also bringing toys into your home without realizing it? It’s easy to get caught in the cycle of buying little things here and there (especially when there’s a good deal), but all of that adds up. Take a look at what you’re bringing in and ask yourself if it’s truly necessary.
And remember, you are the gatekeeper of your home. Once you take full ownership of that role, it becomes easier to say “no” to things that don’t align with the clutter-free space you want.
6. Support from the Motherhood Simplified Community
I asked the moms in the Motherhood Simplified group for their thoughts on this, and they had some great ideas! One mom, Allison, shared that she tells her kids not to unbox any new gifts until they decide if they want to keep them. If they don’t, she buys the toy from them and then donates or regifts it. This gives the kids some control and helps prevent unnecessary toys from cluttering up the house.
Another mom, Makeda, suggested setting up an “experience fund” where friends and family can contribute. Then, when it reaches a certain amount, you can use it to take your kids on an experience instead of adding more physical items to your home.
Final Thoughts So, Courtney, I hope this helps you get started on tackling the toy clutter in your home! I know it can feel like an endless battle, but with a big declutter, clear boundaries, and some intentional planning around incoming toys, you can get it under control.
For everyone else listening, if you have a question you’d like me to answer on the show, go ahead and submit it! You’ll find the link in the description to send in either a written or voice question. I’d love to feature more of you and help with your decluttering challenges!
