Why decluttering is emotionally draining

We are emotionally invested in our clutter which makes it hard to let it go.

This episode we dive deep into how we are deeply connected to our clutter. And then we talk about how to move past those connections that hold us back from breaking free. Because decluttering is emotionally draining. 

Clutter activates our childhood emotions.

We live out our childhood wounds with our clutter. Maybe your parents told, or modeled to you, that you need to keep everything just in case. So you do, without really thinking about it.

I had a parent who showed love by giving us things. For a long time I repeated that pattern with my children as well. 

This is normal to repeat what we learned as children. It is also important to recognize that patters we repeat and if they are working for us, or not. 

Clutter is overwhelming, so we avoid it at all costs. 

This may literally be choosing to watch Netflix instead of declutter. Or it could be more subtle in the form of going to Target, the park or finding anywhere to go but home.

If we are avoiding our homes we are often likely also buying things. Even if it's a “great deal”, a super cute thrift store find or BOGO. 

When you don't need it, it's not a good deal. If you already have several you probably don't need more. 

Which leads me to the next reason we get very attached to clutter. 

Expert marketers tell us what we need in order to be “good moms”, or to otherwise fit into society. They play on our emotions.

Once we can recognize when this is happening it gets much easier to avoid. 

So how do we move past all these emotionally intense experiences surrounding our stuff?

The most effective way I have found is to dive into decluttering with a critical mind. When we declutter from our emotions is when we regret it, or get rid of the wrong things. 

You can start small, and you can start simple. 

Sometimes we think we have to go from where we are now to the extreme opposite that we probably don’t even want. You have time/ there are so many steps between where you’re at now, and white walls one spoon and 2 outfits. It's just no possible to go from drowning in clutter to having nothing. 

You can get support in this.

Real quick here are some of my recommended steps to take today. 

  1. start to let the layers of stuff go. Just one thing, today, that's all it needs to be. See the relief you feel, and how safe it really is to declutter.
  2. Take a step back and ask critically “why is it hard for me to let this go”, “realistically what will happen if I let this go” what is the WORST case scenario. 
  3. create voids in your home and life so that you can fill it up with something better. We fear white space not realizing those are the spaces for the things we DO want to have grow. 

And of course you can always enroll into Decluttering Simplified for step by step support. I created this course because decluttering is emotionally draining, and having support makes it so much easier!


3:40 – the list of reasons that we might be feeling emotionally invested into our clutter and therefore it makes it difficult to declutter 

16:23 – how do we move past the emotional clutter 

20:27 – new/free challenge Release your clutter like a powerful mother challenge – May 3rd-10th inside the facebook group 

23:24 – its not as bad as you think 

24:42 – Whats the worst that could happen? 

26:09 – join us in the facebook group for the release your clutter like a powerful mother. Join here

28:14 – share this podcast with your friends

Here is the full transcript


Even if you have little time, energy or day to day support