Motherhood has enough emotions on it’s own without adding the extra stress and attachments and complications that can come with a cluttered home as well.
Ask any mom what she wants more than anything and it will likely be something along the lines of making her some food, or cleaning her house. If I could I would go to every mom’s house and clean it for her on a regular basis, and make her home cooked meals, but that’s just not realistic so I teach moms how to do it for themselves! Let's talk about the ways clutter is toxic
As we go through this process there are often times big emotions that come forward – both positive and negative.
It is emotionally draining to be surrounded by clutter, and while I don’t think any of the moms I have done this with are “hoarders” I do think that they are all an integral part of our consumerist society and end up drowning in stuff, and bogged down by a cluttered home.
So what effect does clutter REALLY have on our emotions, and what it is like to try and break free from this cluttered way of life and how does it affect our Motherhood experience? There are so many ways clutter is toxic, let's start with this.
Clutter fills an emotional void
Whether that void is comfort, a need to escape, or happiness. We hold onto things, or buy new things because we think it will give us comfort or happiness. Or we go buy something new, or keep closets full of junk because we think somewhere buried in it is our key to happiness, and it’s not.
“Happiness is an inside job”. This is true. I have learned that any house I live in is my dream house. Any job I have is my dream job. Because I am HAPPY with myself. Keeping things is not what keeps us happy.
In fact keeping too many things has the opposite affect. Everything in your home and space is demanding your energy and attention. If it isn’t giving you value, it’s taking it away.
Clutter brings down our relationships
When we live in a cluttered home with our family, it has an affect on our relationships. We get frustrated by the mess. We are annoyed by cleaning the same things over and over again. Our things can make us feel suffocated, and like there isn't room to breathe let along ENJOY each other's company. Marriage is meant to be more than a series of doing chores, bed time routines and paying bills.
Our home is our sanctuary. A place to feel up each other's love buckets. But when we are surrounded by junk, that just can't happen as much as we want and deserve.
Clutter gives us security
We hold on to 5 pairs of tweezers in case we need them. Twelve tubes of Neosporin in case of a scrape. Three crock pots, an instapot, and dutch oven in case we use them all at once?
There is security in having things “in case of an emergency”. However 99% of the things ( I just made that number up but hear me out) that you are holding to in case of an emergency and for your own security you could drive somewhere and replace in under 20 minutes for under $20.
It’s a false sense of security to hold on to too much. This is another one of the ways clutter is toxic.
Throwing away excess is a waste of money
When we throw away the things we have purchased in the name of decluttering it can feel very wasteful of our money. Here is the thing, you already spent that money! It’s gone, and you’re not getting it back. Unless you have a garage sale or try and hustle it off on Facebook marketplace.
Cut your ties with the clutter and shift your mindset that you’re throwing money away. You know what is a waste of your money? Buy duplicates of items like tweezers and brushes and cleaning supplies because you can’t find them in your cluttered home!
Once you get rid of the clutter and can easily see, know and access what you already have you stop wasting money!
Clutter is emotionally overwhelming
Often it isn’t until we start to part with it that we realize how overwhelming it really is. When we start to purge our items and see what is really there, we kinda go “woah, maybe I am a hoarder”, and mama, you’re not.
We hold onto our things for so many reasons, and when we start to let go we are forced to look at the parts of us that we have been hiding from.
The irony in that is that once we are no longer surrounded by messes, we get to see the things that really matter most to us.
We get to spend the time with the people who matter most to us.
Without the noise, distractions, and to-do lists CAUSED by our clutter.
Being surrounded by too much stuff weighs us down. Distracts us. Desensitizes us.
Breaking free from that is scary, because all we’re left with is us, but it is so worth it! Opening yourself up to that kind of freedom is what made me able to be the mom I want to be.
You have TIME for your kids without all the clutter.
No more nagging!
Totally free to play, and model what it looks like to pursue your happiness without clutter.
It is empowering and empowered moms, raise empowered children, who grow up to be empowered adults, and that is how we have a positive impact on the world. And I hope you are able to see just some of the ways clutter is toxic.